- 00:00 Introduction
- 4:50 Suppressing the truth isn’t worth it
- 10:20 The Karate Kid and ‘conflict equals energy’
- 24:42 How do we bend the rules and change the context?
- 36:05 The ‘her-story’ of invisible patterns and the spiritual impulse
- 51:48 The courage to lean into conflict
- 1:04:55 How can polarity be the foundation of authentic relating?
- 1:20:27 Capitalism is killing us. How do we transform it?
At times it may seem the more troubling features of our collective cultural experience — polarization, conflict, isolation — appear so intractable they are now to be expected as almost normalized behaviors of modern community life. They’re not.
Each one of us has the natural intelligence and creativity to transcend polarities with a greater perspective, transform the energy of conflict into resolution, and live an authentic life true to our self-chosen path, beliefs and values. At any time we can make a conscious decision that can alter our life, relationships and community.
Fortunately, we also have tools and insights available to help explore the practice of what is known as authentic relating and creating deeper human connections. In this conversation, Aviv Shahar is joined by Jason Digges, artist, philosopher, teacher and author of Conflict = Energy. Jason is a global leader of the authentic relating movement.
Aviv and Jason take a closer look at its origins and central ideas, and the many revealing stories in Jason’s personal and professional journeys. Among their insights:
- Our empowerment comes from our ability to see the context that we're in and make a conscious decision: Do I want to do this? Do I want to play this game?
- If we are among the 1% that are able to somehow engage with the source code, we can potentially go through several karmic patterns in one lifetime.
- When we come together and there is friction, we bump up against one another ― there's so much to learn. We need authenticity and courage to lean into it.
- The foundation of authentic relating is taking multiple perspectives. We have a polarity of dignity, or my voice matters, and humility — listening to others. If either goes offline, we end up in posture or collapse.
- These are simply tools you can use in every situation — to help you get in touch with yourself and create a space with others. That's why it's called authentic relating.
- The first person you need to become authentic with is yourself, or there isn't really anything else.
- Capitalism is killing us; we don’t need to abolish capitalism as an economic system, but stop capitalizing on people; stop looking at people as commodities.
This conversation is part of the continuing Portals discovery into what is emerging on the frontiers of human experience in this time of profound change. Information about upcoming special events can be found on the Events page. Also visit and subscribe to our YouTube channel.
In authentic relating, we share impacts, we practice emotional clarity in and of ourselves, we practice boundaries, we practice ‘welcome everything’ and assume nothing — all of these different things that we do in our relationships. But the advanced authentic relating is actually to be able to transmute the energy of a situation in a way that creates clarity, connection and teamwork - from conflicts.